Archive for category From the hip

3 things I do that are killing the planet and don’t intend to stop doing

Yes, he's doing exactly what you think he's doing

Yesterday was Earth Day.

The internets were full of all sorts of handy tips of everyday things you can do to save resources and save the planet — things like turning the water off while you brush your teeth or keeping your tires properly inflated.

For the most part, I’m fairly environmentally conscious. I reuse and recycle just about everything I can. I don’t buy bottled water. I avoid plastic bags whenever I’m shopping. (Seriously, dude at 7-11, don’t put my single pack of gum in a bag!) I leave my thermostat set a couple of degrees higher than most people in the summer and lower in the winter.

With all that said, I’m going to use this post to make three confessions. I have a a few habits that many would consider environmentally unsound, but I do them anyway. And I have no plans of changing.

1 – I take really long showers.
We’re talking “until the hot water runs out” long. The shower is a sacred retreat. There are few places more comforting to me than the “think tank.” I love the steam. I love the white noise. I love the lack of distractions. I can’t hear the phone. I can’t hear the doorbell. I can’t hear the cars pass by on Park Springs Boulevard. I love the shower. You can take my steamy, hot shower away when you pry the loofah from my cold, dead, pruney hands.

2 – I drive a bigass pickup truck.
Well, there might be a little remorse here. It’s not so much that I wouldn’t rather be driving a smaller truck, but that I couldn’t cost justify it. And sadly, the “smaller” trucks these days (a) really aren’t that much smaller and (b) don’t get significantly better gas mileage. Put a new Dodge Dakota next to the old Chevy LUV pickup I drove in high school and you’ll see what I mean. When you combined the higher resale value, better utility, and the ability to actually FIND them here in Texas, the bigger truck just made a lot more sense. (Seriously, most dealers don’t even bother stocking the small trucks around here. Go figure.) All in all, I’d love it if they brought back the LUV. That was a great, economical little truck. But when I can get 20mpg in my Sierra, the “mid-size” options just don’t make much sense. I should also point out that I don’t commute. I work at home, so the truck hardly gets many miles put on it anyway. So far I’m on pace to keep the odometer in the four digit range all year long.

3 – I eat cows. Lots of them.
Cows are tasty. Supposedly they consume a disproportionate amount of natural resources, and I think for cows that spend their entire lives on feed lots eating imported grain there may be some truth to that. But seriously people, have you eaten grass-fed beef? Have you had a thick steak grilled over an open fire until it was a nice juicy red medium rare in the middle? If you’ve only been eating “well done” beef, you may as well have been eating charcoal, anyway. You go ahead and switch to a vegetarian diet. I’ll eat your cows for you.

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Throwing money at your problems

Thurber Brick

There are certain people who think the solution to any problem is to simply throw a lot of money at it. Other people will say that’s the surest way to make a problem worse. I think the key to this conundrum is that people just aren’t breaking down the issue simply enough. You see, money is intended to be exchanged for goods and/or services, and with certain goods it is simply unwise to start an exchange based on a delivery method that involves throwing. Bricks, for example.

Need an afternoon pick me up?

This clip from 30 Rock always cracks me up.

Alec Baldwin deserved an Emmy just for this scene alone. He may yell on his kids’ answering machines, and the rest of the Baldwin brothers may collectively wallow in cinematic mediocrity for several more decades to come, but no matter what, it will have all been worth it to bring us this moment.

And you may think I’m kidding about that.

Hitting the road

Howdy, y’all!

My buddy Dave and I are hitting the road this morning to head to California for a friend’s wedding. Because we’re crazy nerds we’ll be blogging the whole trip. You can follow along at http://sidehike.net/roadtrip if you’re so inclined. And I’m betting if you follow this blog, you probably are. (And you probably could stand to be a little busier at work, too.)

See ya there!

Happy New Year!



Have a great 2008!

Merry X-Man!



Wait a minute, that’s not quite right…

The World is My Birthday Cake



Happy Birthday to me.

Chicken and Waffles



Two great tastes that taste great together.

(Howdy from Memphis!)

It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood



Won’t you be my neighbor?

You say goodbye, I say hello.



Hello, hello from the big mirrored bean in Chicago.