There are a lot of things I could say about this picture. Why am I being swallowed by an enormous muppet-like carpet monster here? And why am I so happy about it? Could this “incident” be why I have an unnatural fear of dorky plaid? Why is it that every time I was “dressed up” before I was six they put me in a bowtie? All I know is that I’m suddenly very hungry for popcorn….

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